Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
We just shotgunned beers for America
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I party with great urgency now.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
