Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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