what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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