just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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