if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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