You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
He shit in the fireplace
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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