Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Randomize
