that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
How external is "for external use only"?
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
