I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize