he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
