i think my mom watched the whole time
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
