You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
