no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Randomize
