We won't sleep together?
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Randomize
