Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
