I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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