oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
wow bdsm is so cute
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