Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
