Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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