okay pat passed out under dana's car
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
