never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
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