idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
is wine microwaveable?
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize