ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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