I just cut my nipple shaving
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
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