Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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