He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Randomize
