Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize