peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
we're making bets on your personal life
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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