I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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