well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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