We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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