He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
