He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
