I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
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