He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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