I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize