if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize