id be glad to
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
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