i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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