Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize
