Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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