Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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