what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
