College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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