just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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