i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
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