just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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