she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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