Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Actions speak louder than pants.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize