Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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