I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
